After the overdue fight that seemed like it went on forever, we dragged our tired bodies to the edge of the sidewalk where the water flowed down the street like the waterfalls you tell me you are going to take me to one day.
But everything falls through at least once, the love we have wouldn’t be anything if it didn’t crumble at our feet. Your words tear through the foggy air that we stumble in and touch my brain softly like the butterfly that landed on my bruised knees when I was a child.
Though at this moment all I can comprehend is the buzzing neon light above us in the dystopian city that we call our minds. You nudge your way into mine.
You get so tired of living like a god that your ground has shattered into a million sparkling little pieces that now take place of the twinkle in my eye. My eyelids fall heavy and the we wait in the car as the sun sinks in the and the ocean starts to melt together with the ground we walk on.
Unresolved and pending in the nervous air we disregard any problems we once had and turn to our dreams for closure.
Something that isn’t globally covered is the mistreatment of Natives by Canadians. With Canadian Thanksgiving having just passed and American Thanksgiving just around the corner, it’s important to remember that the land we live on is not ours.
Last week, I had the pleasure of attending a youth conference in my city. The conference consisted of a keynote speaker, and workshops on gender and sexuality, oppression, discrimination, and power.
The keynote speaker, Jules Koostachin, is a filmmaker and daughter of a residential school survivor. She uses her films to show the long lasting trauma residential schools have left in her community, while also showing the light hearted and loving parts of the Aboriginal community that the media usually does not focus on. Jules shared with us how hard school was for her, how she never felt that she was smart enough, or smart at all. I feel this is something a lot of youth can relate to, and seeing someone who is so successful share stories of how she felt she would never make it was incredibly inspiring.
Jules also spoke of how oppression is not a competition, and we should not be trying to compare hardships, but instead share our stories in an effort to help each other heal.
Jules shared with us a heartwarming film she made about her youngest sons who are twins, and how the relationship between being a twin and being Native intersect. You can watch that film here. You can learn more about Jules and find some of her other films on her website.
To look at your past and scoff at it would be a tragic act to do. We learn from it, and in time we need to accept it for what it is and what the universe put in front of you to battle off because it knew you could hold up the weight of the world. Don’t let it haunt you to the end of the earth. Don’t let it creep up on you in the middle of the night. Just keep telling yourself that you will be alright.
Notevember, writing everyday for the sake of exploring all kinds of words.
Wednesday, November 1st
Im failing to forget about everything basically.
About how I could’ve loved you better and fixed this. Instead of sitting here listening to songs that make it extremely hard for me to forget everything.
Thursday, November 2nd
I rejected you at first, your love and care.
I thought that if I forced myself to forgot the idea of someone loving you existed.
Then I wouldn’t have to face the perishing heartache afterwards, but i did.
I slipped and fell so softly, i almost didn’t notice the falling. But the discomfort leached on to me until i had to acknowledge it eventually.
Friday, November 3rd
I’ll write to you, throughout this journey, i’ll write to you about several feelings and emotions that are so common between us because it’s simply Its what i do best.
I’ll write to you because my words carry a great value and i’ll never put more effort into anything but my words.
So for you, I’ll write
Saturday, November 4th
to you, my person.
Someone who i can easily talk to about how my sanity is leaving in little pieces.
She goes through impenetrable battles and she raises her head high.
Most importantly she carries pure wisdom, she sees the bigger picture like its left there at the back of her mind.
She’s a mosaic art piece and every piece of her tells a story deeper than the other.
My person, a rock in a fathomless atmosphere.
Sunday, November 5th
Love poems that screech in your head, so loud you try to block your ears. Love poems they fill your heart with an unknown feeling, perhaps its because you miss so dearly and you remember so clearly. How it once felt to love so deeply. But even if you grew past that, love poems speak so loudly. You don’t understand, you want to yell back ” do you have to be so loud? About your love and all that desires for someone? Do you have to be so loud about how dwelled in someone’s heart?” But you cant, and you stay quiet for the soul purpose which is of your heart. Because you once again remember how it felt at some point of your life.
Saturday, November 6th
a wicked smile, tears from laughter
she’s the epitome of an outstanding soul
in a crowd full of a million faces that look the same
she’s standing right there uniquely effortlessly
no way you’ll miss her.
Horror movies have always had, and always will have, a special place in my heart. When family movie night would roll around each week when I was a child, we would either watch one of the Harry Potter movies or a complete horror movie. This is one of the few major parts of my childhood I have carried on throughout my years. Here are my reviews on 5 of the best horror movies out there!
The movie takes place in the summer of 1988 (my all-time favorite decade for fashion, music, and movies) and follows a group of 13-year old kids ‘horror’ stories and bravery. They find out something they call ‘It’ has been feeding off the children’s fear in Derry, Maine. The kids (referred to as The Losers Club), of course, explore and work to defeat It. (I am not good at writing non-spoiler summaries so I will just leave them as a few quick sentences.) This movie has to be one of the GREATEST movies I have ever seen in my life. Not only is it in my favorite genre of movie (horror), but it includes so many other themes and ideas; for example, unbreakable friendship is the most prevalent theme in the movie, as well as never giving up, staying strong, and caring about others more than yourself. Writing this is giving me so many feelings of happiness and I just want to watch the movie again (I have seen in 13 times.) The children actors in this movie have to be some of the BEST actors I have ever seen. They play into their roles so specifically and responsibly and I KNOW that is their job but… they are teenage boys. (Okay I’m actually not exaggerating I’m not sure what it is but this movie brings me more joy than H*rry P*tter which is a HUGE deal if you know me…PLEASE watch this movie it is so great.)
This movie is about a little girl who moves with her neglecting mom and dad into a new apartment (Pink Palace Apartments) where two other parties live. Coraline hates living there because it is so boring and spends most of her time exploring to make time go faster before she starts school. One night, she finds something that seems wonderful at first glance, but she soon discovers it is not what it seems…Coraline is a movie that holds a SPECIAL place in my heart. A lot of my memories with my sisters as babies include forcing them to watch this perfectly creepy movie. The aesthetics… the character development… Coraline HERSELF… the sidekick cat… everything is AMAZING and I really recommend you watch if you have not already.
This movie starts off with the ‘Avon Lady’ walking around the neighborhood, trying to sell her products. Since no one was buying them, she decided to try to sell them at the mansion on top of the hill, which was said to be haunted. There, she finds a man with scissors for hands who she takes to her house to take care of him. He faces a lot of struggles in this modern life, but manages to keep busy by beautifying the town in more ways than one. The room he sleeps in belongs to the ‘Avon Lady’s’ daughter, who he falls madly in love with and would do anything for. I strongly believe this movie does not get as much recognition as it should. The AESTHETICS OF THIS MOVIE!!! THE CONTRAST OF EDWARD AND THE TOWNSPEOPLE!!! The colors of the town houses are probably my favorite part. And the whole story in general… it is just genuinely amazing (to watch and to listen to). I’m also a sucker for a good love movie, so love and horror in one movie equals a happy Shelby. This, like Coraline and It, has more of a deep story with a few aspects of horror, but it still gets the job done.
Michael Myers, a six-year old child, brutally kills his older sister one night and gets locked up for fifteen years. When he is released at age twenty-one, he goes back to his hometown in Haddonfield, Illinois and attacks multiple other teenagers, but ONLY on Halloween. I love any movie with teenagers as the main characters. I’m not sure why, but I have always found them interesting. (Only adding to the perfect kind of movie in my eyes… it takes place in the 70s). This movie is not really scary, but more interesting to learn about each character and why Michael does this. My sisters, who are 9 and 10, said this movie was funny to watch because the main teenage character did many dumb things throughout. And, to be honest, this was the 70s… the acting was not all that great. This is just a CLASSIC horror film you need to see once in your life.
Don’t fall asleep… If you do, you will die. After two girls have a nightmare about the same man and one of them dies, the other one discovers what is truly happening. A man in a red and green striped sweater kills with his razor hands, but only when people are sleeping. What I have learned from these movies is kids are a lot smarter than adults. Oh, and, the police are always unhelpful. This movie, like Halloween, is not very scary, but it has a very cool idea. What happens in their nightmares happens in real life, unless they do not let it happen. Overall, if you think you’re afraid of scary movies, pay more attention to the story behind the characters than the actual characters themselves. All of these are just like any other good movie… This movie especially is a good beginner horror film because it is kind of scary, but not scary enough to give you nightmares for weeks.
Watch all of these in a dark room by yourself at 3 AM, covered up with a blanket with nothing else to accompany you for a REAL scare and a lot of entertainment. Also, if you want to fangirl about any of these movies, my DMs are open.